Day 35

August 18, 2009

So many great and interesting responses to my facebook note. So many things to say…
Maybe I should begin with this. I am not having a bad time in Ghana LOL. I’m actually having a great time contrary to some beliefs. I have a couple of blogs and I have kept a journal since I was in the 2nd grade. Writing for me is cathartic and I usually only write when something is bothering me, I have some interesting thoughts that I don’t want to lose, or I need to think through something that I find complex. Usually good things or things that make me happy aren’t complex, aren’t intellectually stimulating, and don’t take much energy to think through. All my thoughts don’t get to make it to the computer or paper. Most things I simply contemplate them and they stay in the back (or front) of my mind. I can talk about how the house-helps and I at my host family’s house talk to each other like we are in the over dramatic soap opera-like African movies. How I have taught virtually every kid in the neighborhood I live in my name and its soo cute to hear them scream it at the top of their lungs when they see me. I can talk about how the kids in the orphanage learned some new English words and how to construct some new sentences because of a matching game them inspired me to create. Or how random locals quiz me on my Fante or how my host mother insists on talking to me in Twi so I can remember and the family listens to me pronounce the words incorrectly just so we can all laugh. I can talk about how the other volunteers and I went out to a quiet bar, requested dancehall and hip life and turned it into a club (and by accident turned a funeral into a club but the attendees didn’t seem to mind, lol.) Or how I wish I can take all of Ghana’s pineapples home with me that I love so much and eat every day. On the contrary, I could mention other no so great incidences that I just didn’t feel like writing about: issues with getting my phone fixed, sporadic phone network, food preparation, and power outages. But none of these are not that big of a deal. Not complex and don’t require much thought or contemplation. Sooo many things to write about, but my journals aren’t usually meant for those things. I would need to make special effort to remember to write about all the little anecdotes. Some do stick out in my mind but not all. The ones that do, I write about. But the question is, “Am I writing for me or for other people’s desires?” Or, even if I write about the funny things will I then get criticism about how the funny stories should outweigh the not so funny ones? Or will people get offended by what I thought was funny and what wasn’t? What I can’t promise is that everyone will always love what I write and that is each person’s prerogative. What I am always willing to do is listen. I am always interested in people’s thoughts and perspective. Everyone has something to learn from anyone. As a smart person once said, “nobody is a nobody.”

The one thing I would tell (and have cautioned) any black American or any black person in the Diaspora is be careful not to romanticize Africa. Don’t come here excepting to go back in time and experience some firsthand account of indigenous people who you see as some displaced ancestors you never met. You wouldn’t go to China, expecting the nation to stuck in time. Europe, the Caribbean, Australia or any other place. Come to listen, watch and learn. Not only learn from other people, but learn more about yourself. I thought I came to Ghana with absolutely no romanticization at all. But I was mistaken. I came to listen watch and learn but, unconsciously, came in the name of panafricanism and unknowingly, secretly assuming people would interact with me with the same interest. Assuming that bridges could be made and understanding from both sides could happen. Sigh, in this instance, I was sadly mistaken. There feelings, and interactions that I want to get off my chest. Especially when there is such an obvious interest in what is assumed to be the black American life style. But when some of my experiences are explained, whether verbally or written the miscommunication is still present. Even when it is clear and in print, my thoughts are still seen as if there is an attack on them. On Ghanaians. I’ve decided that for some people it’s a lost cause and a waste of energy. But what is still sooo interesting is that I can’t talk about my experience because they find what I say offensive, but they can judge and stereotype black Americans all day long and except me to be ok with it? Interesting. I had a long discussion with a Ghanaian who took offensive at what I wrote, but in the same conversation proceeded to talk about how black Americans are all about hip hop, sports and don’t care about school because of “the system” etc etc. As my grandma would say, “look at the pot calling the kettle black.” In my writing I talked about very specific incidences at specific times and even gave approximate percentages yet the Ghanaian openly generalized my people. I said, “you are doing exactly what you accused me of doing and I wasn’t even doing that.” They put words in my mouth and ASSUMED that I was talking about all Ghanaians and I wasn’t. How could I when I gave SPECIFIC examples about incidences that directly contradicted the bad ones? But, interestingly, those went unnoticed. Just like the example of my interaction with the South African consulate in the US. No questions about that. They didn’t address their bias and beliefs of black American stereotypes. Interesting. I am HERE in YOUR country, learning, asking, listening, reading, watching the news, pay attention, all to LEARN about where YOU come from, yet you come to me with stereotypes based on scant evidence that you have applied to an entire nation of people?! Yes, Americans do it all the time. PEOPLE, do it all the time. But we are supposed to be better than that. We are in the business of helping people. We are suppose to be more informed, more willing to understand, educate and be educated instead of erecting mental road blocks that hinder in trans-Atlantic, multicultural, even global progress. Someone said, on my facebook page, we have a lot of work to do. It makes me wonder who is the “us” that needs to do the work if some refuse to listen, read, and understand? Of all places, Ghana, where leaders and advocates of panafricanism resided (Nkrumah, Du Bois and others black American intellectual expatriates), some Ghanaians are still only worried about how they are perceived and choose not to concern themselves with others.


I think that was my romantization. I wonder if panafricanism is merely a dream for blacks in the diaspora. We shall see.